Breakthrough
by Emma Solo
Summary: Han and Leia have to confront their feelings for each other on the long journey to Bespin. When fate seems intent on splitting them apart, will they go their separate ways, never looking back? Or will they confess the love they've both been hiding? R&R


_**Breakthrough **_

By Emma Solo

Disclaimer: Two words. Not. Mine. ; - )

Princess Leia Organa ran her silver hair brush down her long, chestnut tresses. Each damp lock of hair received equal attention as she carefully removed tangles with practiced ministrations. The brush itself was one of the few items she still owned, given to her by her father Bail Organa. It was one of few possessions that managed to survive the destruction of Alderaan over three years ago.

Allowing a thoughtful sigh to escape her lips she set the brush down on her make-shift nightstand on the Falcon, and stood from the bed.

Leia's bare feet padded lightly across the cool, hard durasteel floors as she walked into the deserted cockpit. She stared out into space, gazing at the billions of blazing stars surrounding the Millennium Falcon. She unceremoniously plopped into the co-pilot's oversized chair, never taking her exhausted eyes off of the view. Leaning one elbow on the worn, leather arm rest, she placed one cheek in her cupped hand.

Against all self-control –which she found herself possessing very little of lately - her thoughts wandered to Han; whom, even in her own mind, wouldn't leave her alone. She relived the kiss over and over, and how it had come to an end all too soon. It had been more gentle, yet demanding than anything she could have ever imagined. His lips tasted strangely sweet, mingled with Corellian Ale and something that couldn't be placed, something so distinctively Han. It was perfect.

Too perfect, and Leia knew it, yet she could not erase from her mind the sensation of his rough, warm hands holding her body in a possessive embrace. Then, the very subject of each and every one of her thoughts emerged through the cockpit door, stifling a yawn. "What're you doin up so late?"

"Hmmm," she sighed, "I could ask you the same thing you know, but I won't." Leia swiveled the chair around to get a better look of his large frame, illuminated by the soft glow of the lights on the dash board. He looked, as always, undeniably handsome. His thick, brown hair was tousled giving him a scruffy appearance and his deep hazel eyes shone with the starlight reflecting in their depths.

"Well I'll answer you anyways." He stepped closer, coming further out of the shadows and into the light. "We need to talk."

Leia stiffened. "What about?" she inquired, trying her best to sound nonchalant. She knew all too well what was coming. She couldn't hide from the topic forever, as much as she wanted to. Sooner or later, Leia would need to confront her feelings for Han.

"Us," he answered simply. "What happened earlier…" he trailed off, growing silent.

Leia ducked her head with an almost inaudible, "Oh." She swiveled back around towards the stars, hoping they would somehow provide the strength she needed to let go. "Han, what happened – it was a mistake."

Han frowned. "What do you mean 'it was a mistake'?" He failed in hiding the sting of rejection from his voice. "You didn't exactly fight it. Admit it princess – you liked it."

"Of course I did!" she burst out louder than expected, causing Han to flinch. "I _loved_ it, in fact, but I refuse to let you hurt me!" Unwanted tears as stubborn as Leia herself pricked at her eyes. She thanked the gods silently that it was too dark for him to notice. _I refuse to cry in front of him!_

"What makes you think that I would _ever_ want to hurt you Leia?" Han inquired in a softer tone, lowering himself into the pilot's chair. When she didn't respond at first, he called her name gently, "Leia?"

"You're leaving," she said, "you're going to drop me off at the rendezvous and you and I both know you won't ever come back." Keeping her voice steady was becoming a harder task with every passing minute Leia watched go by on the dash board chrono.

"Leia, you know why I have to leave, that much I can't change," he said, "but I could come back, if I had a reason to."

"What are you saying?" Leia was honestly afraid of the answer. She was afraid she'd have to make the next move. Love – if one could call it such – was one game Leia still hadn't learned how to play. Strategy she could handle, but this was far more unpredictable.

_And war is predictable? Right. _

Han scooted further in is seat, perching on the very edge, and leaning so close Leia's pulse fluttered. "I'm saying I want you to give me a reason to come back. Just say the word and I'll be back before you even have time to miss me."

Leia shifted in her seat and cocked one thin eyebrow in question. "And you're assuming I'm the one to give you a reason?"

Han leaned back, heaving a frustrated sigh. "Now who's making things difficult?"

"I'm being practical," she countered. "Who said you'd even make it out of Jabba's palace a-!" She froze. Leia quickly averted her gaze, feeling hot blood rush to her cheeks. She wanted badly to take it back, to reverse time, but could only hope he hadn't noticed her slip.

"What?" he challenged venomously. "Alive?" Apparently he had.

"Han I –"

"Save it your worship," he sneered. "Here I thought maybe you cared, but it turns out I was wrong about you. You're just about as cold as Hoth. Don't worry, I'll drop you off at the rendezvous, and I'll never get in your way again." Infuriated, Han pushed himself to his feet and stormed out of the cockpit without giving Leia a chance to even form a response.

Leia stared after him, her mouth slightly agape, until she remembered to breathe again. She was too much in shock at first to realize she had been holding it, until her lungs burned for oxygen.

_What just happened? _

o0o

Han hit the wall with resounding smack. "Damn it."

_What do things always end that way between us?_

He cursed himself for being so vulnerable with her. For ever assuming that she cared enough about whether he would survive or not. Why did the mere thought of anything hurting her sicken him, when she could pass off what could be his death sentence like it didn't even matter?

Han sunk, defeated, into the cushions of his old mattress with his head hung low in his hands. He had to wonder, whatever happened to "Solo?" What happened to needing no one?

_Leia Organa, that's what. _

Looking around, his bunkroom looked the same as it had for years, decades even. His bed was unmade as always, dressed in the same old, rumpled sheets. Several cluttered shelves and lockers still sustained the ever-growing layer of dust. His ship was the only thing in his life that hadn't been flipped upside down and totally rearranged. And apparently, it wasn't the only thing in his life malfunctioning. With a mind of its own, his fist swung out and slammed the closest locker with an angry bang. The metal door swung open, spilling the contests to the deck plates.

"Awww, kriff," he swore.

Han bent down to pick up the items scattered across the cold floor. He picked each object up and tossed it back into the locker with hardly a second glance, until he came upon an unfamiliar holo. He turned it on and the image came to life. It wasn't a picture he recognized, but he knew the particular moment the minute he laid eyes on it. The Leia in the holo smiling at him was so rare and beautiful he found the simple task of looking away to be nearly impossible. The holo had been taken directly after the destruction of the first Death Star, and Leia was hugging Luke and Han as they emerged from the battle. It had been a huge and glorious victory for the Alliance.

Han realized suddenly that he would do anything to see her smile like that again.

o0o

Leia stood anxiously, quietly, outside Han's door. Her mind battled over whether to knock, or to walk away. The "rational Leia" demanded she turn and walk the other way, forgetting the scoundrel forever, but something else, something stronger told her to confront him. Taking a deep breath and gathering her strength, she lifted her hand timidly, and raped on the metal door three times. No answer. She knocked again harder, and still there came no reply. Leia sighed and rolled her head back, looking at the ceiling with her hands resting impatiently on her hips. Just as she turned to leave, the door hissed open, revealing Han standing with his arms crossed.

"Yes, your highnessness?" he asked. The sarcasm dripping from his words was almost tangible – Leia could have sliced through it with a viro-blade

"Han." His hardened face relaxed and softened visibly at her gentle tone. "I came to apologize. I didn't mean it like that at all."

He nodded his head and motioned her inside his cabin. "Why don't you come in; we need to talk." Leia stood still, hesitating, and Han noticed her discomfort. "I promise to behave," he added with a small smirk. This seemed to relax her a bit as she followed him inside the privacy of Han's bunkroom.

He sat down on the bed and patted a spot at his side which Leia refused. "It's fine, I'll just stand," was her excuse for remaining in a less vulnerable position. Being around Han left her vulnerable enough as it was.

"You sure? It's pretty comfortable…well, sort of." Leia nodded her affirmation and waited for him to speak with her arms crossed tightly if a little protectively across her chest. Leia could feel her insides form a knot as her anticipation grew. Whatever he had to say, she just wished he would get it over with. _Remember Leia_, she sternly reminded herself, _don't let him fool you, he's leaving. Remain indifferent – you don't care! _

Han leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, blowing out a long breath. "We gotta clear up a few things between you and me." Absently, he lifted a hand to rub the old scar on his chin. How many times had he done that? The gesture had long ago become a habit.

Leia agreed, "I would say so." She kept her posture stiff, hands behind her back, and demeanor cool.

"This isn't gonna work your worship," he pointed out, motioning towards her stance. "I feel like a kid at the principal's office. You're not lecturing me – why don't you sit down?" Again, he patted a space on the bed to his left.

Glaring icy darts at Han, she sat down on the edge, far away from the pirate. _This is the closest I ever want to be to Han on his bed_, she thought. Was that yet another lie? Her body begged to differ with that statement. The very idea sent shivers down her spine, leaving a giddy tingling sensation at the base. Leia neatly folded her hands in her lap and turned her full attention to Han.

"What exactly do we need to 'clear up' captain?"

"First of all," he said, turning his body so he faced her. "No more of this 'captain' stuff alright? And second-"

"Wait a minute," she demanded. "If you're going to call me your worship, or your highnessness, or even princess, I am most certainly not going to stop calling you captain, _captain_." She made sure to add enough emphasis on his title.

Han seemed to consider this for a moment before agreeing, "Fair enough, _Leia_," he added in an equal tone. "We've known each other for three years; I think it's time for first name basis."

"You think?" Leia teased for a moment but then sobered again. "So what is it you wanted to talk to me about, really?"

"Why are you always depriving yourself?" He asked seemingly out of nowhere.

Leia frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm gonna go ahead and say I want you Leia – I really like you – and if you want me too, why do you always run away?"

"Well who says I want you? And I do not run away," she said, crossing her arms again. "If this is about what happened in the maintenance bay, I already told you it was a mistake, and I –"

"Whoa, Leia, slow down," Han said holding his hands up in a gesture of peace, "don't go getting all defensive on me before I even get a chance to talk. We're never gonna get anywhere that way."

"Then would you please stop making assumptions?" Leia's glare felt like icy water rushing through Han's veins, like a Hoth glacier melting inside him. Now if only he could melt the ice princess – that would be a start.

"Leia," he says in almost a whisper, taking her hands. He hadn't expected to feel them shaking. "Sweetheart, there's nothing to be afraid of, I'm not gonna hurt you."

"I know," she argued, pulling her hands from his, "I'm not afraid; not of you."

"Then what is it?"

"What makes you think I'm afraid of anything, and why do you care anyway?"

"You're trembling," he pointed out for the second time since leaving Hoth.

Leia shot up from the bed, demanding, "Why are you doing this? Why can't you just leave me alone?" Against all of her willpower, her voice cracked and eyes brimmed with unshed tears. She was losing control. She tried taking in a deep breath, but it only sounded shaky and made her appear even weaker. "Why?" she repeated in a whisper, mostly to herself.

"I'm doing this because I care," Han admitted. "Because I hoped maybe you did too." His voice lowered an octave, becoming a low sensuous rumble. In reality, he felt more defeated than anything.

"Han," Leia breathed, "I do care, more than I'd like to admit, but you're leaving so none of it matters anyway." Her tears were close to spilling. She knew she had to escape before he had the chance to see them – to see how fragile she'd become. Without giving Han a chance to respond, she whirled around, but before she could flee, he grabbed her wrist. Her strength was no match for his and struggling only managed to frustrate her to a point where she could no longer hold back the moisture in her eyes. "Han, please," she begged, her voice weak. She hated it.

"Sweetheart," he gently turned her around, and placed a finger under her chin. "Hey, look at me Leia." He lightly caressed her cheek with the back of his hand wiping a single tear drop away, and surprisingly, she let him. Leia grew tired of fighting, tired of running and hiding from feelings so strong, tired of pretending she didn't care, and her eyelids drooped. They slid shut not only in exhaustion, but in ecstasy.

_Why have I fought this? It's so nice_, she thought. The feeling of his rough hand on the soft flesh of her face was mesmerizing.

As if hearing her thoughts he asked, bemused, "you like that?" but he wasn't teasing her; he was enjoying it in the same way she was. His growing desire for her was beginning to demand attention at the mere feel of her warm skin against his. Only Leia could stir him so easily. Leia nodded in approval, encouraging him further. A tiny part of his mind was wondering, _what happened? _It seemed they went from fighting – or rather Leia fighting Han off – to her accepting his caresses openly.

Leia was slowly beginning to melt, leaving a sea of uncharted territory for Han to venture into. Cautiously he tested his luck and leaned so that their lips were just barley touching. At the feel of his lips and his hot breath against her parted lips her eyes popped open wide. Han didn't dare move an inch, afraid of shattering the precious moment they were caught up in. Surprising Han greatly, Leia leaned forward and closed the small space between them. Her delicate lips met his gently before they both lost themselves in three years of built up passion. Passionate and demanding, Han possessed Leia just as much as she did him. They became intertwined for a fleeting moment of pure bliss, ending as soon as the need for oxygen arose. They broke apart, out of breath. Han offered a tentative half-smile, his face still close to Leia's, which she returned.

"Now how was that princess?"

"It was," she searched for an adequate word, "Nice." She spoke with a soft smile, one that reached her brown eyes and made them sparkle. A faint blush crept into her cheeks.

"Nice?" he challenged her with a cocky grin, "I'll show you something _really_ nice princess." And then he leaned in to kiss her again, but she stopped him this time.

"Han," she pressed, backing away and crossing her arms with one delicate eyebrow raised. "Aren't you forgetting something?"

"What?"

_How can he be so ignorant?_ Leia wondered. _Have I not mentioned it several times?_ Leia shook her head incredulously. "How…?" she shook her head again, trying to clear her baffled thoughts. "How can you just act like there isn't a war going on? How can you pretend or even ignore the fact that you're leaving and may never come back? I honestly don't know how you do it Han, because I can't." Leia pinched the bridge of her nose with her thumb and forefinger, trying to keep herself from crying out of sheer frustration. "Even if you do survive, you won't come back, not for us, you've always wanted to leave. Don't tie yourself down, because someday you'll regret it, and that will hurt a lot more than watching you go," she admitted, to Han as well her herself.

Han sighed, "Leia, do you know why I've stuck around for three years?" He waited until she finally met his eyes out of curiosity before he continued. "Not for myself, not for the Rebellion, not even for the kid. I stayed because of you, and not because you kept telling me "we need you," but because _I_ needed you." He took a step towards Leia, getting so close she had to crane her neck to look him in the eyes. "You've made leaving so impossible. I don't want to Leia," he said, "I can't just walk out on you. I guess we both know damn well that I probably won't return."

"Then don't leave Han!" Leia exclaimed. "Stay with us, stay with me. You'll be safe at the rendezvous."

"I'm tired of running, of always worrying that a bounty hunter will find me, and that you'll get hurt because I was an idiot," he said. "I have to go and set things right, and pay for the mistakes I've made. Who knows, maybe Jabba will be in a good mood when I get there."

"Not likely," Leia replied dryly. "He's got years of stored anger on you."

"Yeah, you're right," he sighed. "I'll be lucky if I get fed to the rancor. That'd be a pretty merciful death from Jabba after what I've done."

Leia winced. "Please, don't say things like that. I've seen "death by rancor" in holos. Even the fake versions look painful."

"Hey," he soothed by putting an arm around her which, surprisingly, she didn't shrug off immediately. "Don't worry, everything's gonna be fine. Let's just stop worrying about the future and enjoy what we've got now." To further make his point her pressed his lips to her temple and kissed it tenderly.

Turning around in his embrace, eyeing him suspiciously, she asked, "and what might that be?"

Han froze. He didn't want to point out something that she didn't think was there. _What do we have?_ He wondered. _What does she want to hear?_ He was treading on unfamiliar and potentially dangerous grounds. _Hey don't worry Solo, she asked you; she wants you to tell her. _

"Whatever you want princess," he decided. "If I cross a line, you let me know. Tell me what youwant me to do, because if you don't, I'm bound to screw things up with you."

"Who knew you could be such a gentleman?" Leia half teased and half marveled. "But you know it isn't all about me Han. If we were to be in some sort of, well, relationship, we'd have to agree on things. What and where are _your_ boundaries?"

"Sweetheart, if you can imagine it, then I can make it happen," he replied with an arrogant, lopsided smile. "I'll go as far as you'll let me."

"That all depends on one thing Han," she said. "And you have to promise you'll be honest."

"Anything for you princess."

"If Jabba lets you go, come back to me as soon as you can," Leia said quietly.

"Leia," Han said, in a soft tone matching Leia's. He grabbed her shoulders and told her, "If I can come back, I promise you that I will. That's all I can promise right now."

"That's all I needed to hear," she breathed with a soft shake of her head, as she leaned closer. Her damp hair was almost completely dry, and formed little ringed curls near the ends. They bounced and swayed with her movement. Timidly, she tucked a lock behind her ear with an absent mind. She lost all common sense and any ounce of self control she still possessed in Han's smoldering gold flecked irises. They darkened to a warm brown with longing, and Leia could only imagine what he was thinking while staring at her. Leia's breath became unsteady, and her heart raced as he inched closer. Her lips parted in anticipation with a mind of their own.

Unable to wait – or stop herself – Leia met Han at the halfway mark, reuniting their lips in a warm caress of tongues. She brought her hand up to stoke his cheek and run her fingers through his unruly hair. Han, in return, enclosed Leia securely in his arms. He never wanted to let her go. Her small frame felt tinier than ever; more fragile, but Han knew better than anyone that Leia had more than enough inner strength to make up for it. She had more determination, more compassion, and more will power than the entire Rogue Squadron combined.

Leia's eyes opened slowly, and she pulled away with reluctance. "What am I going to tell the Alliance?" Leia wondered. "People are going to be curious when they hear I've spent three weeks alone on a small freighter with you."

"You don't have to tell them anything while I'm gone, it's none of their kriffin' business anyway." He leaned closer still, and whispered seductively, "no one has to know."

Leia's eyes rolled back and closed, fighting off the urge to take him into her arms and personally give him something to remember her by. She had to swallow hard once before she trusted her voice enough to respond. "I can't lie." The excuse sounded pitiful even in her own ears. Lying was something Leia had been required to do so often over the years. She was becoming an expert, with an exception of Han and Luke who could point out her lies.

"You don't have to lie, just don't tell the truth."

Leia's eyebrows knitted together. "That's an awful fine line to walk Han." She pulled her head from his, just then realizing their foreheads had come together for a brief moment. "I can't focus, Han, I can't think."

"Then don't think sweetheart," he said. "You don't always have to be the analyst."

Han watched her step back. He noticed her chest rise and fall several times with each deep breath Leia took to clear her head. "Han, I'm sorry," she said. "I want you – gods help me I want you – and sometimes I just wish we could…oh, who am I kidding?"

"What?" Han wondered with peeked interest. "What'd you wish we could do?"

"Nothing, it's just a silly idea; more of a fantasy really."

"Come on Leia," he coaxed, massaging her hand like he had in the maintenance bay. "There's no such thing as a silly idea when it involves you'n me sweetheart."

Leia sat down on the edge of Han's bunk, bracing herself of the palms of her hands. Sighing, she replied, "Sometimes I wish we could just fly away, and leave everything else behind us. Just you and me," she finished in an almost inaudible voice.

"Let's do it then!" Han exclaimed, throwing his hands up. "We'll get the hyperdrive fixed and re-stock at Bespin, then just fly away." Han was more than ready to forget the rest of the galaxy, and take Leia far away where the Empire would never hurt her again. He'd been too late to save her the first time, and was determined never to let that happen again. As long as Leia was in his sight, and even when she wasn't, Han would protect her.

"But what about the Rebellion and Jabba?" she questioned.

"To hell with the Rebellion!" Han declared. "To hell with that slimy old Hutt! To hell with the galaxy! None of that stuff matters – just you and me Leia."

She chuckled softly, "I wish it were that easy," she said. "But I've devoted my whole life to the Rebellion, I promised my father I would keep fighting, and I'm not giving up until the Emperor is defeated. After what happened with –" she swallowed, "Alderaan, this war for me has become personal. I've lost too much to give it all up now."

Han nodded. "I understand, I won't try to push you away. Wherever you are; that's where I'll fly to as soon as I pay Jabba."

"That means a lot Han," Leia told him seriously. "For now, until you come back, why don't we just be friends – good friends – and then we'll see where life takes us."

"That sounds like a plan," he agreed. "So, _good_ friends then?"

"_Very_ good friends."

~The End~

I know it's been a while, so I just want to let you know that I was formally Darth Jayne for those of you who knew who I was before I took a loooonnngg break from writing fanfics. How was my "comeback?" (In other words, did you like the story?) It may have been a little bit rough, even though I tried to make it smooth. Han and Leia's life is one bumpy road to begin with anyways.

Thanks for reading!

Special super big thanks to my beta reader, Fallon Skywalker, who has remained faithful through my absence. _Thanks a bunch! _


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